


The Fake Boyfriend Fallacy

by LtSarai



Category: The Big Bang Theory (TV)
Genre: Drabble, F/M, Fake Dating, Kissing, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 23:36:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 594
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20379997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LtSarai/pseuds/LtSarai
Summary: Penny sees a couple of guys she used to date at the grocery store and panics.





	The Fake Boyfriend Fallacy

**Author's Note:**

> They're both single for the purposes of this story. I may or may not continue it, so I'll leave it "in progress" for now but for all intents and purposes you can consider it completed.

“You’re my boyfriend for the next 24 hours, got it? Consider this a verbal contract.”

Sheldon heard the words Penny said, but couldn’t fathom the meaning behind them. She said it in a hurry, like she was starting to panic.

“I beg your pardon?“ he said, nearing offense. What possible reason could she have to alter their relationship for a mere 24 hours?

Penny growled and pulled Sheldon into the cereal aisle by his bicep. Speaking quietly, as if afraid they’d be overheard, she explained.

"I just saw a couple of my ex boyfriends - didn’t know they knew each other - and I really don’t want them to know I’m single, ok? I figured it would be easier if you were actually just my boyfriend for a day rather than ask you to pretend we were dating. You’re not great with the acting.”

Upon realizing she still had hold of his arm, she let go. “Sorry.”

Sheldon smoothed the sleeves of his shirts down once more and said, “Thank you.”

Continuing with his arms crossed, he said, “Penny, that is patently ridiculous. Why should it matter if you are single or not? And why me? Could you not have fabricated a theoretical boyfriend? They would have no way to detect the lie. Your reasoning is flawed, but your acting ability is sufficient.”

Penny, impervious as always to Sheldon’s reasoning unless it helped her, pouted. “It matters because being in a relationship means social success. It means someone wants to spend so much time with you that they change their title and make time for you. If I’m single it means I’m a failure. They’d see that they were right to cheat on me because no one else wants me.” She saw in his eyes that he was about to respond so she steamrolled over him. “And even if it’s dumb, that’s how the general world sees things and I hate it but I care what other people think about me, Sheldon! I don’t want to be seen as a failure, even if I am one.”

Before she could continue her argument, Sheldon cupped the back of her head kissed her. It was chaste, but his lips were soft and his thumb slightly caressed her jawline right beneath her ear, causing her to shiver.

He let go just as she was about to reach for him. When she opened her eyes, his features were softer, less judging.

“I saw the men you were speaking of coming closer. You wouldn’t let me get a word in and that seemed a sure way to stop you speaking.” He shifted his weight and crossed his arms again, defensive once more. “And it wasn’t your reasoning that was flawed, but my knowledge of social situations. Surely now I shouldn’t need to be your boyfriend for a day, but if you still think it necessary, I will go along with it. You are not a failure.”

Penny just stared at him dumbfounded. Finally, she closed her mouth - still tingling from his kiss - swallowed, and shook her head.

“No, Sweetie, that was really only for if they came up and talked to us. If they saw you kiss me they’ll leave us alone.”

Sheldon nodded. “Very well. Now, since we’re here, I need to replenish my Big Bran and Froot Loops, and I believe you were getting Special K?”

Penny was still processing what had just happened. “Huh? Oh, yeah. Strawberries.”

The rest of the shopping trip was uneventful but Penny couldn’t get the kiss out of her mind.

_This changes things…._

**Author's Note:**

> If anyone takes inspiration from this story and wants to do a continuation, let me know! We could make this a prompt and have a "multiverse" collection! There are an infinite number of Sheldons and Pennys!


End file.
